I always hoped that I would one day personally get to adopt, but once I married Mitch, that choice no longer became just mine. I was called to marry Mitch, and that became my highest calling, second only to serving the Lord. Like most couples, my desire to adopt far surpassed that of my husband's in the beginning (and that is putting it generously). I would love to say that I quietly and graciously took my request to the Lord, rather than berating my husband about it, but alas, that would be lying. I was angry with God for a long time. Why give me a desire- a biblical one at that- and not allow me to pursue it? Eventually, I realized, I could pursue it! I could pray- for my heart, for Mitch's, and for contentment. I could serve in other ways- volunteering, donating, educating. So I did. And we did. And 8 years later, here we are, with 3 beautiful little boys who are 5 and under and you reading this and probably thinking we have lost our minds. And I guess we somewhat have!
We don't need to adopt to be happy. We don't need to add one more child to our home to be content. Adoption is not about me and my desires or my family and its happiness. Adoption is not about finding a child for our family. Adoption is about a child in need finding a loving and fitting home. Adoption is about crucifying my desirers, expectations, and dreams to display the beauty of the gospel and how Christ has adopted us, as believers, in whatever way the Lord sees fit. Our desire is to one day in the future add to our family through adoption. However, we are walking this journey with open hands, recognizing that our goal and God's goal might be different. Just like in life, and pregnancy, we might not end up with a child in our home. And though, if that day comes, we will deeply grieve, we also can rest confidently in the Lord's plan for our family no matter what.
So what do we know?
We know we are using Lifeline Adoption Agency. We have been incredibly impressed with the organization, communication, and most importantly, the spiritual maturity and joy that has radiated from every single person we have worked with at Lifeline so far.
We know that we are pursuing international adoption! This is probably going to come as a surprise to a lot of you, since we are very invested in foster care ministry, but we are very confident in our decision for our family. However, it was a decision that did not come lightly and a decision that we have worked through for several years now. Most importantly, it is a decision that will not effect our current or future involvement in the foster care ministry!
We know we are hoping to adopt a child from India! Why India? Long story short, we both knew we desired to adopt from an Asia country and the staggering number of orphans in India was hard to ignore. Did you know that India has over 20 million orphans, making it the country with the largest number of orphans in the world?
We know that our child will have special needs. In the beginning of this process, we filled out a questionnaire that details what special needs we feel we can handle as a family and what we couldn't. However, until we match, we will have no other details than that.
We know that our child will most likely be a girl in the 0-2 age range. India requires that we maintain birth order in family and the child will have to be younger than Lawson (who turns 2 in August).
Where are you in the process?
We are accepted in to the program, and about 1/2 through our homestudy. We realize that we are opening up about this a little earlier than most people, but that goes back to our desire for the Lord to use this process in any way he chooses. Could we possibly not be homestudy approved and ultimately not get to adopt? Sure. Wouldn't that be hard to share with people if it happens? Most definitely. But it also is part of our journey and once again, we are resting confidently in the fact that God has his hand in this, no matter the final outcome. We shared our pregnancies early with the same mindset- and when we faced a miscarriage I am so thankful that we have a community to support us and to remind us of God's truth and promises.
How can you help?
PRAY. Although we feel confident in this journey, we are scared. The process is overwhelming. The potential needs of our future child are daunting. The financial commitment is down right terrifying. And we already feel Satan feeding lies into our insecurities. Please pray for our spiritual strength. Please pray for our marriage & family. Please pray for the Lord to continue to orchestrate this journey and for us to be content in how He chooses to do it.
EDUCATE. If you have been through an adoption before, know someone who has, work for a ministry that aids families, or literally anything having to do with orphan care and have some wisdom or advice, please reach out to us! We are doggy paddling over here and would love a life preserver or two!
PARTNER. As someone who absolutely hates asking for help, hates receiving help, hates being needy in general, this is the hardest part. We absolutely cannot do this on our own.We will not be able to shoulder the financial commitment on our own. So we are going to be asking for financial partners in this and trusting that the Lord will provide through that. So if you think you might want to help us bring home a child through adoption, please prayerfully consider it! We will be launching several fundraisers in the coming months and would love to partner with you. If financial giving is not your thing, there are so many other ways we could use your help in the coming months (prayer, sharing our journey and promoting our fundraisers, etc.)
We are excited. We are hopeful. But most importantly, we are incredibly thankful for the gift of adoption we, ourselves, have already experienced in Christ.
“It is important to realize we adopt not because we are rescuers.
No. We adopt because we are rescued.”
David Platt
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